There are certain activities which come with such risks that they merit special licensure or certification. Most, if not all, therefore come at a cost.
Slackpacker instincts persuade lots of people to find ways to participate without the instruction.”Hey, it’s just a piece of paper,” they tell themselves, but that’s dangerous and just fucking dumb.
You don’t undertake training for a piece of paper. You do it for the knowledge that will prevent you from dying a long way from home 100 feet underwater, 5,000 feet above the Earth, on a racehorse, etc. If there’s any question as to whether something requires special instruction, consider the mere existence of a certification program as sufficient grounds to take it.
There’s also the issue of insurance. If you injure yourself on a motorcycle while touring the Ha Giang Loop, for example, the first question the insurance company is likely to ask is “Are you licensed to operate a motorcycle?” If the answer is no, guess who’s not getting their medical bills covered.
If any apply to you, don’t think you need to do this at home. It’s fun to take these classes abroad and is often cheaper.
Follow the links below to learn more.
A lot of people think you can get this magical thing called an international driver’s license and it’s valid anywhere. You may have even heard people say they have one.
They don’t. It doesn’t exist. What does exist is an international driving permit.
An international driver’s permit is merely a document that translates your American license into the language of almost any place you’d want to travel. You could do this yourself of course, but if you go to a AAA branch office, they’ll create one for you for a surprisingly small fee. They’ll also certify it, which isn’t meaningless. AAA is respected worldwide and international rental companies are familiar with the permits, so it’s a good way to avoid confusion at the counter.
Officially speaking, a US driver’s license is all you need to operate an automobile abroad, but get the permit. If you get pulled over — quite likely in places where you stick out like a sore thumb and can’t read the traffic signs — you’ll be glad you have it.
Boating is an amazing skill, but it requires a significant investment of time, effort and money. It’s often more economical to simply pay someone to do it for you.
I say this with some regret, because there are so many awesome places to explore by water, like the lakes in Italy, the canals in Netherlands, harbor of Hong Kong, etc.
Whether it’s for motor or sailboats, you need an International Certificate of Competence (ICC) to show you have the skills the United Nations has determined are necessary to operate a craft, such as navigation, rules, seamanship, and boat handling.
There are different types, which include:
Speaking of motorboating, the mother of an A-list Hollywood actress once asked me to motorboat her at a black tie fundraiser, and I did. If you ask me who it was in person, I promise to tell you.
It was the burning question: Should I spend the time and money to get a moped and motorcycle license before I travel? I should have listened to my friend Christine who said: ”You definitely don’t need a motorcycle license, but you really do need a motorcycle license.”
People will tell you that few rental places overseas check your license — and that’s totally true. It’s also irrelevant. You need to know how to properly operate a bike, because — trust me — you’re going to want to ride one. The scenery in places like Argentina, Vietnam, Greece, Pakistan and more is best explored on two wheels.
This licensing, unlike the others, must occur at home, because you need it printed on your main driver’s license. Plan for this.
Motor scooters and motorcycles famously need constant repair. If you’re in a city, no big deal. If ride into remote areas though — especially alone, sweet Jesus — you should know basic functions, parts and repair. Ask your instructor what’s most likely to go wrong and how to fix each, such as:
There are a lot of schools where you can get dive certified (SCUBA license) that foreign excursion operators will recognize. They’re all acronyms, which is peculiar, but instructors I know consider PADI and SSI the standard bearers.
Years ago, I met a nomadic diving guide named Liam in Colombia who worked worldwide and had seen it all. Aside from making me the best cup of coffee I’ve ever tasted, he pulled back the curtain on the shadiness of the diving industry and warned the rest of us against shitty folks who will take you out on a boat, run through the basics on the way to the reef and roll you overboard for an hour.
A lack of certification therefore won’t prevent you from diving, but that’s not a good thing. Any guide who isn’t too concerned about your creds likely isn’t too concerned about their rental equipment either.
Instruction doesn’t have to be expensive. Reputable instruction overseas is precisely the same as at home, and it tends to be much cheaper. To get certified or simply familiarize yourself with the different programs, follow these links:
Nearly anyone can go out and do a tandem jump for a few hundred bucks, but if you want to safely jump without supervision, you need training.
The United States Parachuting Association (USPA) issues four skydiving licenses — ranked A through D — which indicate progressive levels of skill and experience. Level A is the most basic, and it requires, among other things, a minimum of 25 jumps as well as successful completion of written and practical training. Once you it though, it should be recognized and honored worldwide.
Is this expensive? Absolutely. Programs that just get you to level A will set you back a couple thousand dollars or more. If you want to throw your body from a plane without worry you’ll reconnect with mother earth at a speed less than 200 MPH though, that’s the cost.
Fortunately, the cost per jump falls after you’re certified, because you don’t have to pay for supervision. So if you plan to do it a lot, the initial outlay is worth the cost.
No matter how you feel about the second amendment, it’s an indisputable fact that Americans have an unusual obsession with guns that doesn’t exist elsewhere.
That said, people around the world do own guns, they just have to undergo extensive training and licensing. You’re not going to do that, if only because you’re ineligible to do so.
If you want to shoot, the first lesson is this: Your American firearms licenses and permits have no validity elsewhere. If you want to pick up a gun, you have to research each country individually, which I assure you will end in disappointment. Restrictions elsewhere are far more robust than at home.
If you want to shoot a gun in a foreign country for hunting or sport, you’ll need to be in the company of a certified guide or on private property. It doesn’t hurt to arrive with some level of knowledge and certification though, so consider basic courses in accordance with National Rifle Association guidelines.
My privacy policy is simple: I don’t share your information.
Yea, it’s just a name, email and nationality, but I’m sure there are people who would pay for it. My thoughts on that: fuck those people and fuck those fuckers who sell personal information to them. You’ll find none of that monkey business here.
If I get hacked and your info get stolen, I’ll shoot you a note to let you know. I don’t deal in passwords, credit cards or anything like that though, so there’s almost nothing for anyone to take.
To see the full privacy policy — it’s pretty boring and cost me a lot of money — you can follow the link at the bottom of the page or in the confirmation email.
Domestic American air travel is a racket run by three major companies and a few smaller ones who effectively collude on prices to screw passengers and support their bloated executives and corporate structures.
Even regional jets, which are technically independent, are fucking death traps that I literally never, ever fly.
It’s not this way in other countries, because most people are sensible and see transportation as akin to a public utility. It’s therefore common to find flights on foreign carriers for under $100. I frequently see fares less $50.
Booking far in advance is therefore unnecessary, except of course in places where tickets sell out. Avoid the temptation to book months or weeks out if you’re just trying to save money. Not only will doing so lock you into dates you might regret, you may end up paying. Why? Booking sites now sniff for your computer’s location and display higher prices for foreigners.
Rude, right? Blame the mirror. We invented that.
First, some bad news for most Americans: automatic transmissions are as rare overseas as manuals are in the US. Unless you want to seriously overpay, make friends with someone who owns an old Miata and learn.
Second, anyone who wants to rent a car should obtain an international driver’s permit. This is easy — just 30 minutes at AAA.
When it’s time to rent, don’t get tempted by lower prices with small, local companies. Go with a big multi-national.
Understand your insurance situation through-and-through. Know the limits of your credit card’s automatic coverage and have a printout of the policy. If you can get a translated copy, even better. If you’re still in doubt after all that, just pay for their coverage.
Research the scams. Before you drive off the lot, walk around the vehicle and video record it. When you return the car, do the same. Also record yourself locking it and depositing the key in the night box if you return after hours.
If you get a notice from the rental company later saying you owe for damage or not returning the car, you can send them those videos with an E-vite to go get fucked. You might also copy tourist law enforcement, so they get fined to oblivion.
It’s tricky, but you need to basically study each country’s road laws and signs like you’re getting your student driver’s permit again. Most places have tricky rules, and they love to fine gringoes like us for violating them.
In Cyprus, for example, you can be fined for eating or drinking anything behind the wheel, even a Snickers. In Denmark, you’re legally required to look under your car before you get inside to ensure no one is underneath. In Spain, drivers with poor vision have to carry a spare set of glasses. Dirty cars are illegal in Russia, as is splashing pedestrians on a rainy day in Japan.
In some places, driving is really difficult. I pity any fool who tries to drive in Cairo. You can also very swiftly kill yourself on a German highway if you’re untrained. Driving at 120 MPH is far more complex than simply pressing the accelerator further.
Fare classes are highly inconsistent.
First class in one country is generally different to first class in any other. The same is true of second, third and so on. They vary wildly by country and system.
If it’s fiscally reasonable, I choose first for early mornings and overnights. They really are better, even just for security of your belongings.
The one time I settled for a second-class overnight, I had to physically fight a mouth-breathing Russian girl who was sweating vodka and wouldn’t stop burying her face into my lap to huff my underpants like Whip-Its. I wish I was making this up, but it’s true. I arrived sleepless, angry and ugly. It ruined my first day in Lisbon and I only had five. First class would have been worth the cost. Second class is my usual go-to. For shorter trips or anything after 9 a.m. I go second.
If I want an adventure, I go even lower. Some agents won’t sell those tickets to tourists though unless you insist.
Nomads and backpackers who don’t do the travel hacking thing usually buy cheap flights. Be careful of taking that too far.
For starters, you need to observe weight limits on baggage. In the US, no one gives a shit, but elsewhere they care. The care deeply. Never buy a ticket that forces you to pay weight overages.
Seats are also important, but not for comfort. I never take bulkhead or exit-row seats unless I pay for early boarding. Both offer less (or zero) under-seat storage, so being in a later boarding group puts you at risk of having nowhere to put your carry on — or as you’ll hear them called “cabin bags.”
I’ve even been on a flight where the attendant nearly made me check my personal item. I shut that down by threatening to create a scene and de-board, but I could have avoided it by paying $8 for priority boarding.
Countless people have asked if I used an around-the-world plane ticket for my first trip.
My simple response: Don’t ask dumb fucking questions. Also, no, I didn’t.
ATW tickets are nearly useless. They typically require you to book your stops in advance, so there’s too little flexibility. The fine print is also brutal and changes constantly.
Last time I researched them, the price was based on allotments of miles. The number of stops also changed the equation. All of them required you to choose a direction (east-to-west, for example) and none permitted travel in the reverse direction even slightly. Some airlines even insisted all departures had to occur from the same point as arrival, meaning if you traveled by land elsewhere, the airline penalized your mileage allotment.
I said airline there, but ATW tickets come come from a single carrier. Instead, you buy into an alliance, of which I believe there are still only three. Quite the lack of competition there.
ATW fares do lend themselves marvelously to itineraries where you go to a different city each month and make it the base from which you explore the region. This is something we’ll talk about later when we discuss hub-and-spoke travel.
If you have status with a particular airline, you may want to consider their ATW option — emphasis on ‘may’ — but be warned that flying everywhere robs you of some great experiences.
Domestic American air travel is a racket run by three major companies and a few smaller ones who effectively collude on prices to screw passengers and support their bloated executives and corporate structures.
Even regional jets, which are technically independent, are fucking death traps that I literally never, ever fly.
It’s not this way in other countries, because most people are sensible and see transportation as akin to a public utility. It’s therefore common to find flights on foreign carriers for under $100. I frequently see fares less $50.
Booking far in advance is therefore unnecessary, except of course in places where tickets sell out. Avoid the temptation to book months or weeks out if you’re just trying to save money. Not only will doing so lock you into dates you might regret, you may end up paying. Why? Booking sites now sniff for your computer’s location and display higher prices for foreigners.
Rude, right? Blame the mirror. We invented that.
The beauty of hub cities is the slow pace. How slow you take it will vary according to the number of side trips as well as your pace. If you commit to a month though, this introduces the possibility of renting an apartment. Even if you don’t plan to stay the full 30 days, apartment rental is generally very cheap. It can also make cooking easier, which also saves cash.
Cooking for yourself doesn’t have to mean eggs for breakfast and chicken dinners. You can dial up the adventure full throttle if you sign up for a greenmarket food tour and a cooking class right after you arrive. Not only will you know what to do with the local ingredients, you’ll eat better. Plus if you know what you’re doing, the vendors may screw you less, which will offset the price of the guide.
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